catfish19's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Frittering away my millions Uh, so I definitely shouldn't have paid for a gold membership when I'm so in debt. But I wanted it so bad, and hopefully it'll be worth it when it kicks in. Can I justify it as a really, really early Christmas present for myself? As a girl and a shopaholic, I feel a vehement yes. Well, too late anyhow. So, I've been checking my email about six times a day this past week, hoping to hear from Miss ADD-OCD-I-hate-the-world-and-the-world-hates-me. I worry sometimes she's gone and done something stupid, but then she goes and updates her journal and it turns out she is alive after all. So where does that leave me? Why email every day for months, tell me everything that's going on, then suddenly not get in touch for weeks, leaving me to stress about her issues? I know the answer to that. I've done something similar myself. It's too-much-too-soon syndrome, isn't it? How many times have I met someone I clicked with, spent hours talking with them, revealed everything about myself then been profoundly embarrassed later that I was so damn open? In her position, I'd be doing the exact same thing, probably. She did reveal her mental illnesses within two days, declare me to be her favourite person in the world within a week and go on to tell me everything about her family and childhood over the next month. I've never found out so much about anyone so quickly. This kind of thing happens all the time in sexual relationships. Why should it be any different for a normal friendship? I just hope she gets over it. One of the reasons I love her so much is because she's so open about her flaws and so unashamed of her perfections. I don't want to push things. Ultimately, only time will tell whether our friendship will last with oceans and probably years preventing us from seeing each other. I think, and hope, it will. 8:57 p.m. - 2004-11-09 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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