catfish19's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Brotherly love My friend Abe and I have this thing we do - when one of us makes a strange noise (not an uncommon occurrence...), we try to spell it. This is not as easy as it sounds. It's led to such combinations as: Just as a point of reference, when most people sigh, they say "ihhh-hffff". Yes, this is going somewhere. When my older brother is within earshot or view of me, I tense up and hear this noise in my head: It hasn't always been like this. I just don't like to be near him. I try to be nice to him, and he's always been good to me. Still, I can not stand it when he's around. I have my theories as to why. They involve competition, comparison and personality differences, but they don't even come close to explaining the depth of this feeling - which, were he not a family member, I would probably feel more comfortable passing off as a deep dislike. I don't dare venture as far as the h-word. That's too terrible to even contemplate as far as I'm concerned. It's a primal thing I feel in my gut - almost spiritual. I wish it wasn't like this, but I can't change it. I guess it's just fortunate we only see each other a few times a year. 10:22 p.m. - 2005-01-08 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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